trying to
untangle the threads of emotion, faith, and doubt. When people left our
church, when money was scarce, when the needs of family overwhelmed me,
I knew Wednesday morning would make its way around to me again.
We
searched the scriptures, read books and talked out our own therapy.
Funny thing…we seldom found all our answers at church. Sometimes. But
life doesn’t seem to always happen in sync with the current sermon
series. No one has breezed through life on a few hours of church every
week.
What we learned, Krisna and I, is that to make it
through this marathon, you have to know how to dig your own well.
Looking for someone else to always give you what you need, when you
need it is a frustrating trek through futility. Perhaps that’s why we
get angry and bitter when the people who hold the titles don’t measure
up to our expectations.
Maybe they’re not supposed to. Maybe we
should be digging down deep until we hit our own water supply. When we
do, we no longer fear the desert where the ground cracks and the trees
brown out their dying, where no one has our answer, nor the water we
need to survive the wasteland.
If
you have been diligently digging, you know you’re o.k. And if you
burrow down deep enough and get rid of your garbage, other people can
come by, dip their cup in, and find enough nourishment to keep walking
to their own water.
|